PHISHTIX by “Java” John Goldacker

DEC.11th, 11pm: Seminole Chief Jim Billie, Raiford Starke & Pete Gallagher put on a fine concert at Kool Beanz (my coffeehouse in Cocoa Fl. at the time). After the show, my wife Jennifer & I are invited to be Guests of the Chief to attend the PHISH NYE2000 bash at the Big Cypress Reservation in the Everglades. I have to decline, as we planned on spending a nice quite NYE at home…Thank you very much.

Dec.12th, 7am: Awoke from a dream in which we were at the show and refused entrance to one of the largest parties on the planet for lack of tickets, I quickly e-mailed Pete to see if the offer still stood!

Dec.25th, 9am: After weeks of trying to convince (my wife) Jennifer that we should go, that it was THE Place to be on NYE, I opened my last Christmas gift from her - a large box of camping gear. She planned to go all along! And I was the last to know!

Dec.30th, 5am: Stocked up on ice at Kool Beanz, then headed out on the open road in our borrowed VW camper bus. Put the "Gone Phishin’!" sign on the coffeehouse door.

Dec.30th, 10am: Alligator Alley mile marker 29, we reach THE TRAFFIC JAM! Hundreds of cars, thousands of tye-dyes, and a couple dozen police & news cars & helicopters…and 22 miles to go!

Dec.30th, 4pm: We make it to the 500-acre campground - a colorful sea of peace signs, VW buses, & tents. Our assigned campsite is a 2-mile walk to the 26-acre stage area.

Dec.30th, 5:30pm: The stage area! Wow! After thousands of concerts in my life, this has got to be the closest thing to the original Woodstock. The 'heirs' to the Grateful Dead jam-band throne, Phish, have just taken the stage. Over the course of the next 36 hours the band will play 5 sets (a total of, at least 14 1/2 hours) of about 80 songs for 80-100 thousand groovy Phish Phans.

They open with “Water in the Sky”, then after a cover of Traffic’s “Light up or Leave me Alone” & several other original tunes, the band are joined onstage by Chief Jim Billie, Raiford Starke & John McEuen (of The Dirt Band) to perform Jim Billie’s “Che Hun Tah Mo (the welcome song)”, & “Big Alligator” (from his “Alligator Tales” CD) - a real thrill to see our friends onstage with Phish!! Midway through the second set we decide to go back to camp for some much needed rest (we’re not so young anymore!) as the band plays it’s third set into the night.

N.Y.E., 11am: We wake and move camp closer to our friends Dave & Terre. Terre sets up a tent and sells her handmade glass-bead jewelry, as Dave strums his acoustic guitar & sings his songs for passersby. I quickly get out my wire-wrap jewelry making tools, and make some quick spending money.

N.Y.E., 5:30pm: Phreaky Phriday is upon us! As we approach the concert grounds, folks are dressed in the finest party garb, tye-dyes, paisley prints, patchwork dresses, evening gowns & tuxes - and a few in nothing at all! As the sun goes down, the band starts their 4th set with a favorite, “Runaway Jim”. They close the set with a teaser: ”After Midnight” the J.J. Cale penned Eric Clapton hit.

N.Y.E., 11:25pm: As lights go down, we see a huge clock ticking down to midnight. Next to the clock is Father Time (with a big fish head) on an exercise bike (powering the clock). At 11:50pm, he collapses and the clock grinds to a halt. Next we hear an airboat through the P.A., and from the crowd, several hundred feet from the stage, pops up a makeshift airboat. After a few moments the sides come down and the band comes out riding a giant hotdog on a roller coaster track as their song “Meatstick” blares from the speakers - tossing lei’s and party favors to the frenzied day-glo crowd! Kool!

As they reach the stage, Phish depart the weiner carrying a long string of large hot dogs that they force-feed Father Time, reviving him in time to peddle us into the Next Millenium! The band launches into an extended psychedelic “Auld Lang Syne” accompanied by a fantastic fireworks display and the dropping of thousands of giant balloons! Happy New Year! At 12:50am the band tapes “Heavy Things” to be aired on the ABC 2000 show a few hours later. With singer/guitarist Trey Anastasio requesting that the crowd chant “cheesecake, cheesecake” at the end of the song instead of applause, in an effort to “confuse the TV viewing audience” around the world.

Jan.1st,2000, 4am: We decide to leave early to beat the post show traffic as the band plays one of my favorite songs, Neil Young’s “Albuquerque” - they continue to play until past sun-up, as we phind our way home.

I later found out that Pete was looking for us after we had left, apparently we were going to be able to watch the last several hours of the show from the bleacher seats ON STAGE!! And I could have gotten the poster I drew signed by the band!! Oh,well What a long strange wonderful trip it was anyway!

- “Java” John Goldacker