Myself and my four friends went to see the shows in Rosemont/Allstate and I reserved a room at the Best Western within walking distance. I came with two of them and we were meeting the others when they got done with class. 

When we go there we found out there was not a smoking room available to us so I assured the hotel employee's that they would have nothing to fear from us (while visions of the hotel room in the book Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas materialized in my head). Needless to say we had to start getting in the right frame of mind for the parking lot and later the shows. 

Chillum after chillum and beer after beer we were ready to rock and roll, so we hit the lot. We quickly realized that the Rosemont police have no sense of humor and truly suck as it was a weak parking lot scene. We went back to the room to find our friends, and we started to party. We procured some hallucinogens on the way to the show and were ready to go. 

After the show (which rocked) we hit the room and three of my phriends passed out, and me and my buddy Bennett decided at 1:30am it was time to start drinking whiskey and coke - always a smart idea. Well, we got loud and rowdy throwing shit at the passed out phriends.  I believe that the next room was yelling through the walls to shup up. To our amazement, we realized we had yet another day and another show.

We woke at 10am the next morning to wake and bake and hit the hotel bar and start drinking. At about 2 pm we were terribly drunk but couldn't wander because we were waiting for my phriend's little sister and her phriend. Well, at this point the room was bad but our drunkenness kept us from seeing it and noticing it until the little sister came in and almost didn't want to stay in the room. Our options were limited due to A. Cramper Rosemont police B. We were all worth a shit. 

If I remember correctly we even tried to sell my phriend's sister to some guys upstairs for a half a bottle of Amaretto and a bowl's worth of weed (he wasn't very happy about this). When that deal fell through we needed something else to occupy our time, so we decided to rig the window so we could open it up fully and just climb outside to party (actually destroying it would be a better term). 

At this point we started noticing strange roaming russians around in the town of Rosemont and specifically our hotel.  This seems kind of funny but we blew it off at that point. We hit the lot and scored some real good doses.

The show started and I had to go to the bathroom and throw up because of the smoke. It was a good first set but I had to leave during the abbreviated Stash because I was going to throw up again. This is when we started to trip hard. My 2 other phriends were sitting away from us and one of them was tripping. 

When we hit the halls during the set break we found him amongst 17,000 people or so. I guess like- minded people attract each other. When the second set started I was kind of phreaking out along with my buddy who was on his first trip ever. We almost left. 

My phriend Aaron said he would go back in as I was making my way to the door I heard Birds of a Feather and it got my feet groovin' and I decided I would follow him through the scary curtain and see what was on the inside. It was philled with colors and music and dancing and phriends and phun. Because of my bravery I got to see my favorite song, Fast Enough.  I am lucky I did not leave.

After the show we hit the room and decided we would party like classy people and drink Tall Boys of Old Style. We were outside drinking and the cops were cool until they told us to go in. While wandering the hotel and the bar with our heads philled with lsd, we saw more russians, and it was the talk of all the phans around because of the phunny things they were seeing the russians do. 

When we hit the room with our senses all alert because of the drugs we realized the severity of our situation in the room. There were cigarette butts and food all over the floor along with crushed beer cans, stems, seeds, clothes strewn about and I don't even want to know what was in the ice bucket because I think it might have been living at one point. 

The room was in terrible shape I cant emphasize that enough. My phriends sister found some phriends and refused to go in the room it was so bad. My buddy was phreaking out cuz of the security deposit, so we left him in the room. We took our Tall boys and our small Becks keg and decided to drink on a bench in front of the hotel. 

Needless to say we attracted more likeminded phans and a party in front of four turned into a party of about 20 or so. It was about 3am at this point (the bar should be closed), but all of a sudden nice cars started rolling up, and valet's were parking them.  We were all kicked out.  The scene was full of Russians. 

Well, we drank and hassled the valet's until my phriend threw a donut at a car. A guy came up and pushed my phriend, flashed a badge in his face, and said he was a cop. He threatened us with physical violence and such, and finally left and said we should watch it and that we didn't know what we were doing in this particular hotel at this time. 

A girl came out shortly after that and told a story of the infamous bar.  The story was about when she walked in and two Russian guys were holding down a third and speaking in broken English for someone to come and pick the man up. At this point half a parking lot away the "cop" went back into the bar at about 4 am and starting walking people into the bar in suits and helping to park all the beemers and mercedes. 

All these people were staring at us and making comments. We ultimatey decided that leaving the situation was the best course of action and went back to the room.

Once back in the room we found about 2 hours or so of sleep before checkout time at 11 and we all raced to get out of the room before room service found out what we had done and how we demolished the room. All this whole weekend was for was a tune-up for our next week Vegas run. I believe any good story needs a moral so I happened to find one for this story. When renting a hotel room to go see Phish make sure you call ahead early enough to reserve a "Smoking Room."