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PholkTales: Near Catastrophes
I had just left Cincinnati driving to Indianapolis with my friend Twan. We departed around 8am for the Indy Airport where we would be on our way to what was shaping up to be a spectacular event at Shoreline 2000. We had left plenty early plus we gain an hour thanks to time zone difference (don't take any chances with flight times). 

We drove through pouring down rain from the beginning. When we got about half way there we went into a full fledge hydroplane. Now we are doing 70 mph sideways, backward, forward, sideways again, off the road and into the biggest tree in the bunch. All I heard was crunch. 

I hit my head pretty hard on something (like that would cause any permanent damage). I turned around and saw that all the back windows had been blown out and the back right tire had come up through the back seat and was right behind me in the passenger seat. Somehow, other than the sizeable lump that was now forming on my noggin, neither of us were injured. We first donated Twan's glass to a cornfield and then began to size up the damage. Now its raining and we ain't goin nowhere. 

Cops come. They were really nice and let us sit in the cruiser and even let us put our luggage in the trunk. Cop called a wrecker, wrecker came quick. Cop let us use his cell phone to call a ride. We had to call about a dozen times, but "Collin the Couch God" awoke and was on his way for a rescue. Cop took us to the next exit Shell station and dropped us off. Collin was there in record time and was determined that we could still make our flight. 

Well Needless to say by the grace of God, uh Couch God, we did. The plane was delayed 15 minuets for a backed up toilet (Yeah you tell me that happens often). So off to Cali we are minus one car, and up one lump. Well to make a long story short, short, The first night of Shoreline, my first time ever in Cali, first set opener was of course.........Carini. And well I think you can you know the rest of that trip.

 - Matt Spaulding


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