Submit: What do you think it means to be a phishhead?

Elizabeth:

• You've named your three goldfish Tela, Rutherford, and Errand, while your beta is named Wilson
• You ever contemplated naming your pet lizard Icculus - then did
• You kicked a guy at school who is two years older and a lot bigger than you because he said "yeah...I heard that Phish is breaking up...."
• You sadly shake your head when your friend asks if by "Phish" you mean Reel Big Fish
• You made your parents play Divided Sky in the car because there was a really pretty sunrise
• More than three people turn around to stare at you every time the Biology teacher says golgi bodies, because they know you'll say, "don't you mean apparatus," then begin to laugh hysterically :)
• You're planning out what stickers to put where when you actually get a car

Dr. Phil

• You play Wading in the Velvet Sea for your Aunt at her wedding.
• Your English teacher asks you to stop writing papers about the Phish.
• You feel good about Hood
• Your Grandma saved you articles from Florida papers about NYE 2000 at Big Cypress.
• The lady at the post office knows the mailorder process as good as you.
• Your SENIOR quote is "Waiting for the time when I can finally say that this has all been wonderful but now I'm on my way."
• You love cheesecake!!!

Jessie:

• everyone you meet who likes phish are the kindest souls around (especially your solemate). 

• you can still remember the first time you sang the lyrics to "when the cirus comes to town" without even thinking about it (listening to phish on the way to clapton)

Roman:

• you take the day of work, drive across the border to see a band you've never heard of, and nearly lose your job
• you're stopped at a traffic intersection and your friend who hasn't converted yet recites: "see the city... through"
• you keep smiling and think of the next tour
• you're at the opening of bittersweet and someone tells you that you look like TREY.

pHiShHeAd167s:

• you feel connected to anyone you see driving down the road with phish stickers on their car too.
• your friends tell you that you turn every conversation into one about phish.
• trey is your god.

Mikey:

• divided sky tells a story so amazing that words can't describe it
• seeing the boys playing with smiles on their faces makes you feel all warm and fuzzy
• they seem irrelevant when you think of how much you love your solemate jessie

WakkaJawakka:

• Your best friend's mom gave you specific directions before alpine valley to, "Don't buy drugs from people you don't know."  You laugh, because you can abide by the rule easily.
• You have ever played Split Open and Belt.
• You weren't frightened for a minute when tornados hit Columbus, because all you could think about was what jam would come back after the break.
• You have left 6 shows during a Character Zero encore.
• Dec 30th is your birthday, so you always have the best birthday present ever.

rutherford:

• you time your dinner in the oven with a great live bowie... after an intense 30+ minute jam, my food is usually perfect, and if its overcooked it usually means it was a better jam.

Rob:

• on the way home from work, you salute the electrolux service center up the street from your apartment.

Dan:

• You begin everything you say with "One time I was at this Phish show and..."
• You don't mind getting stuck in rush hour traffic on the way to work because it gives a little longer to listen to phish that morning

posternutbag:

• while dancing to phish with your phriends, you not only play air guitar and make trey faces, but also hit imaginary pedals exactly on cue with trey
• you measure the length of roadtrips by how many discs you'll get to listen to
• you don't go on the trip unless it's at least a full show (i'm not that cracked out)
• you had to disable the airbags in your car because every time you listen to mule, you dance so hard the aribag deploys in your face (c'mon y'all know what i'm talking about)
• you spend at least 2 hours a day sitting at/with your (insert whatever instrument you play here), with headphones on, jamming along with the boys
• since the hiatus you've begun touring other bands just to hear them cover phish tunes (p.s-check out string cheese playing the wedge, it's fun folks)

scottyg:

• You hope and pray that they end the hiatus with a phestival so that most of us can share it together.
• You've heard the same version of the same song a million times, but you hear something different every time.
• On each of the New Years Eves since 2000, you've listened to the Big Cypress sets at exactly the same time they were played that night. (Bowie at 4:20 am)
• You listen to phishcast all day at work, not caring what co-workers think when the vocal jam of YEM or a vacuum solo comes on while they are in your cube.

Melissa:

• your phriend sends you this site, and you sit down to check it out... an hour and a half later you're still here, and you forgot you were even waiting for your coffee, it is now burnt but it doesn't even matter. (thanks kim)

RyanC:

• you were one of the first 20 cars @ big Cypress, only to be turned away, and you passed out on the side road.
• when you actually start to cry in the jam for Reba when Trey hits that one damn note
• you start listening to the last 3 studio recordings and say, wow these aren't bad
• you have to always argue with that damn Widespread fan who says that they are the new phish
• you realize that all you want to do is hear mound

rob:

• when you look at the pictures on walfredo.com from the "wedding set" the boys played last month, you see them smiling at each other, and you smile yourself, because you know deep down they will return

Mango:

• you name yer puppy jiboo
• you change a summer road trip to include one more show, just two more?....

Jason:

• After attending numerous shows, you say that when the hiatus is over the next show you will propose to your girlfriend. The girlfriend leaves you, and you must get her back for the first show so it can be everything you could have hoped for.

Christina:

• what you'd really like do is move to Vermont and hopefully run into Trey at the grocery store.
• when you can't decide if you should go on TAB tour in the Spring, just because you miss touring so much, or if you should hold out because there's rumor of Phish tour in the fall, and you don't have money to do both.
• even though you enjoy other shows, you're constantly reminded that Phish is "the way."
• you get goosebumps just thinking about the energy of the crowd at the first show back from hiatus.
• you made a huge collage out of all the ticket stubs from all the shows you went to leading up to Big C with the cover page from the Seminole Tribune in the center.
• you've been tempted to write across your college diploma, "I'm alright 'cause I got a degree."

Adam Seneski:

• You listen to You Enjoy Myself for hours to find out what is really being said
• All you can talk about is what you're going to sell to be able to travel with Phish when they come back... and they will
• You wonder if when you go into the flower shop the florist will tell that the "roses are free"

dani:

• after a long drive, you arrive at your intended destination towards the middle/end of a show (on tape) and feel the need to get out of your car (because it's too confining) and full-blown hippie dance in the parking lot beside it.  And, most importantly, you have no idea if anyone passed by while you were dancing!

michelle:

• someone emails you about your story from this website, & within a few days you & he have plans to hang out for NYE and Jazz Fest and, of course, the next Phish Tour...which I am predicting will be PHALL 2002!

(MSG opener...?)

bobdude:

• you start reading this list at work to burn a few minutes and by the time you're done, 2 and a half hours have gone by, you missed your lunch and will be stuck here until 7:00 because none of your work is done.
• You come home from work and catch your metalhead fiance' dancing on the coffee table, blasting Carini.

Mike:

• people named brian and robert changed your life

Kim:

• You wake up one morning and decide to take the 8 hour drive to Burlington during a snow storm, in a piece of shit Ford, just so you can say you've been to "Nectar's" (Oh and luv the green house)
• For the last 459 days you've been saving every pay check (Yes we have jobs now), so when a tour is announced you can mail order for every show !!

Bdub:

• You know it's bad when the only reason you decide to go to college is because of Phish.
• Then you really know it's bad when you go to Goddard College and demand to live in Trey's room in Hollister 7.
• Finally you know your a fan when every day you dream of the next time.
• The only band member I have left to meet is Mike. As for the other guys, I've encountered them at coffee houses, Higher Ground, MMW show in Burlington.
• Please come back guys... whatever you might think about your solo careers, it will never equal the combined efforts the four of you all made.

tela2001:

• you have a Phish tattoo on your arm

b-real:

• the only t-shirt you want to wear says "No talking during jams"

Michael:

• You think the hiatus is to give you time to start a family

Rutherford:

• when you get into a car accident during an intense ac/dc bag jam, and afterwards all you can say is, "what a funky jam!!!"

MillerTime:

• You will not listen to phish in the shower, because YOU KNOW you will have to start dancing, and then you might slip.
• You will not listen to phish outside in the cold because a great segue might give you goosebumps, and then you will catch a cold.

Dieter:

• Phishhead = your head is full of Phish

Zooby:

• you are on the shitter playing with some kaya and your piece with headphones on, jammin to the new live phish.....

• when you listen to phishcast and know the lyrics to every song you hear.....

• you crave that goo ball, that burrito, and that moment when the "lights go out" so bad that you dream about it

James:

• you tell everyone that 12/31/99 was the best night of your life, and it WAS!!!
• you get told that you have too many phish shirts
• you catch yourself singing "Reba" off guard
• your nickname contains the letters "ph"
• every time you play guitar you seem to always jam into a phish tune
• when you are dancing at a show and start to cry when trey does something brilliant

Highperwastetimeinitly:

• you are getting yelled at because instead of doing household chores and keeping up with YOUR life, you've been online reading about phish/heads/dancing/listening to phish/playing music/ or doing other phish things.

• when you promise to be someplace and (seemingly) unintentionally, are there.
• When people are talking about things that aren't related to phish, and you think they are, so you start talking about phish, and they have this look on their faces like you just bit their legs (like a dog)
• when you realize that after all, you are phish - even if you aren't trey (or mike or fish, even page)- and you are.
• when you're typing ideas to put on the phishhead site, and realize there's too many to keep typing right now!
• explaining phish to your parents. (thanks josh)

Harry Hood:

• you keep telling yourself that Phish Is coming back soon, and whenever anyone tells you they aren't and to give it a rest, you end up getting into a fight with them.

The Internet Animal:

• you smell like skunk

Eric:

• you didn't really want to see a show before the hiatus, but now you would give a kidney to see them just once
• the only kind of milk you drink is hood

Loughney:

• you are at work right now reading these entries... knowing that if your boss sees you you'll be fired...... and the only reason you really have this job is so you will have enough money to spend on those nice fresh welcome back phish shows...

Chris / Christina:

• When you're bored you turn on phish to decide what song describes the mood you are in.
• You call your best friend to tell them about this list.
• When you consider yourself a phish addict
• When you're pondering what you want to do with your life and you get frustrated, so all you can do is call your best phriend and phantasize about getting married, living on a big farm, having phish play on your farm, and loving life with all your phriends cuz that's all you want to do with your life.
• If somebody put a microphone up to your mouth throughout the day, they would discover that you are constantly singing or humming When the Circus Comes to Town
• When you want Waste to be a song at your wedding.
• Nothing makes you more mad than when you overhear somebody talking about phish, so you ask them what songs they like to find out whether they are a phishhead or not, and they reply gin and juice.

Kini:

• Thinking about your first show and the magic of the lots... and how someone once told me, "some people just get it the first time, and it feels so right." That's the feeling of knowing...

Scotty Comet:

• you get pissed cause your ignorant brother gets to say, "i told you so" in reference to the bands hiatus... even though the claim was made 10 yrs ago.
• you're doing 95 past Maine State Troopers in a conga line that is 15 sticker patched cars long.
• You played your first recording of "Dirt" over and over and over to revel in the soul of Trey's voice.

seuss:

• the smell of parking lots makes you giddy.

bettyford:

• you miss your direct flight to San Fran on 10/6 to catch the 10/7/00, even though you're sitting RIGHT NEXT to your gate, but you were drinking a beer and talking about Trey, so (thank God for freq. flyer tix) you end up having to take a dlight to L.A. and sit there until 5:30am and fly to San Fran from there. 

• you get drunk with members of Outkast on the plane, find a page in that skyline magazine that makes references to Vegas (most recent show of ours) and San Fran, become match maker for the stewardess and some cute guy, call phriends from the L.A. airport as they are leaving the 10/6 show so they can laugh at us & give us the set list & find out that Bobby joined the boys for a ... West L.A. Fadeaway!

• after 9 years of Phish, someone points out i've been spelling llamar (ya mar) wrong on all my setlists, i guess i was thinking in spanish?

• you can truly say you rang in the New Year 2000 with 70-something thousand of your best phriends, and you made a label that said, "i don't care if the world explodes" & stuck it on the guy in front of you so you could look at it while you danced.
• You're in the car with your best friend & you start crying while listening to the time clock> Meatstick> auld lang syne from Big Cypress, and as you turn to explain your tears, she is lifting her sleeve to show you the goosebumps on her arm (& she wasn't even at Big Cypress).
• you know that no matter how much music you see & how much partying you do, it's just a philler until the "hiatus" is over, when you can truly be happy again.

ScaryMonster:

• You try to explain the beauty of a 9 hour traffic jam on Alligator Alley in late December, and you really think they are going to get it

• Every story you tell starts with "Ok, I was at this show...."

Kay B:

• you ask you buddy to call when they play Prince Caspian one night at Deer Creek because you're stuck in DC -- then he calls while you're having sex with your girlfriend, but you have to pick up because you know its him, and she tells you to answer it but not to stop ... oh love

Chad:

• after a 1 hour commute from work, you finally get home and sit in your car for an extra 6 minutes just to hear the end of Slave to the Traffic Light.

Rob:

• you and your two roommates break into tears listening to the 12/31/95 YEM.
• people at work, who do not even listen to phish, give you words of support like, "don't worry, the hiatus will soon be over..."

John:

• This is what you come up with to describe to someone who has not heard of Phish (imagine that!): "4 grossly talented musicians who play a rock, R&B, folk, hillbilly psychedelic funk fusion on an episode of Sesame Street where the whole cast has ingested killer blotter (go Bert and Ernie and Big Bird!) and perform outtakes of Rocky Horror Picture Show!" Took hours to come up with that!

Iconoclast82:

• You like Phish because you enjoy their MUSIC, and you enjoy it for the way it sounds

Hank:

• every time someone tells you how much phish wants to be like the grateful dead, you tell them that britney spears wants to be like prince... and they take offense to it

• you accept the fact that just because you are attracted to gordon, it doesn't make you gay

Mik Stavig:

• You get goose bumps all the way through the beginning of piper until they start jamming out...  and then you start playing air drums with fishman.

mike:

• you've never met anyone on this thing, but you pheel like phamily.
• when you are asking for only 2 things for christmas...the damn hiatus to end and to have tickets for at least the opening show

Farrah:

• you are telling your best friend of 20 years about all of these funny entries, like, "your kids are named Trey and Page", and she cries "You're not going to name your kid Fishman, are you!?"

Sunrise Vermonter:

• Your young cousin who you turned on to the band is WAY more of a head than you are, now. And you know you'll be partying together when the damn hiatus breaks. Love you, Jay - ks

• You've been THIS CLOSE to getting your sorry ass kicked because you were insisting to the WRONG CROWD that Phish's classic rick covers are better that the originals by Zeppelin, the Stones, ZZ Top and all.

shamik:

• You take 5 hours out of your day to read every entry on this website and realize that you understand EVERYTHING mentioned.

Pip Anderson:

• When a large portion of your crew can be seen in the slow frames of the Bitter Sweet Motel Movie.
• When you forgive the family for not giving you a ride, when you dropped your transition an hour away from the show. Not to mention it was your tenth night of tour, and the family was only seeing Trey.

Jason S:

• You incorporate Gamehendge on a regular basis into the 8th Grade US History curriculum at the school where you teach.

marc morgenstern:

• you realize what phish plays is more than just music but magic

brookenugs:

• when you read the submissions for "you know you're a phishhead when" and you laugh out loud and get chills and almost cry with excitement and love
• you are in slovenia and no one has heard of phish, and you make it your mission to create a slovenian phan base by spreading the music any which way...
• you jump up and down in your seat when you think about the moment you hear- THE HIATUS IS OVER!!! PHISH WILL PLAY AGAIN!!!!!

Chad:

When you hate yourself because you didn't realize how important Phish was to your life until after the hiatus, and now you're kicking yourself for only seeing the last 4 shows instead of the last 20!

adm:

• you dump your boyfriend because he says, "They're not as good as you think they are."

McGrupp819:

• you check phish.com at least 3 times a day to see when Phish is going to return so you can get you tickets as soon as they go on sale.

aaron:

• you like the idea of them playin' bouncin' for three hours straight at their next show

thomas:

• your life, temper, and outlook completely change for the better.  a friend of mine that got me into phish said, "it will change your life"... and i said, "ok, sure"... but he was absolutely right!!!!

Jiboo Crew:

• you correctly guess what Trey says in Makisupa, and actually believed that you had something to do with it... shwag, ha ha!
• waking up in 105 degree heat at Deer Creek with 90% humidity and still drinking a Sammy Smith
• Journeying half way across the US to Albany for the two opening fall shows simply because you met some really chill kids the previous summer, and they return the favor and come to Chicago a month later!
• Friendship and Loyalty to each other and the band.
• you think the only positive aspect of the hiatus is that hopefully the strung out, non-phishheads, who only go to shows for the drugs and have no respect for the music, will somehow be weened out of the scene!
• mail ordering!!!!
• saving every tix stub and counting ever show you have been to, including Trey projects!

Johnny:

• YEM is the finest piece of music you've ever heard

guru:

• You read this whole list, and try to hold back the tears.

superv2500@aol.com

• come and e-mail me, i will talk about phish phor hours
• u know what everyone else is talkin about on this page
• u ABSOLUTELY UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES EVER lend someone a phish c.d. that u don't have at least 20 copies of

Neil:

• when asked any music-related question, the you give somehow revolves around PHISH one way or another!

Sunrise Vermonter:

• You're stuck in a sweaty, humid bottleneck, getting out of the show at the end of a weekend run, no more live grooves for days, nothing to do do but wait through the rank crowd and pack up and go home, and your girlfriend sneezes and like five people nearby all say "Bless you"--because Phish heads are the kindest heads there are.

rutherford:

• after a long drive home, you sit in the driveway for 6 minutes because Slave to the Traffic Light isn't quite over yet. (And you have to pee more than you could ever remember.)

dankheadies:

• you meet a phan at a show and you all exchange nuggets just so y'all have a little of everything.
• when you're already saving money to go to the first show after the damn hiatus.
• when you see another phan with a phish sticker on the car and you drive up just to give them the thumbs up.
• when someone asks you what kind of music you listen to and you know they have NO IDEA WHAT THEY'RE MISSING!!!
• when you keep driving around puffing cause you want to hear the whole set.
• you and your friends constantly talk about how funky the first show is going to be.

Tim W: 

• When you grow a 6" long beard even though the people at work make fun of you, and you could get fired.
• When you shave that beard to get married...only to start growing it again that very day.
• When you stair at your computer screen at work while listening to a show...daydreaming about the first show back...hoping it doesn't happen the same time your wife has your first baby........cause you would hate to miss it................the baby that is.
• When you get stuck in traffic, put in a CD, and smile knowing you spent 15 hours in traffic for B.C.....and loved it!!!!
• When the Woo Hoo guy recognizes YOU!
• When you and another Phan lock eyes "anywhere in the world"..........grin, smile and nod...we are everywhere.

Ryan:

• every time you hear "Ya Mar" it makes you cry! and you just can't sit still... it brings freaking shivers to your damn body, damn it I love PHISH!!!!!
• When you stayed home New Year's Eve 2001 to listen to Phish because you were so upset that they weren't playing.
• When your girlfriend says you talk about Phish to much.
• When your band attempts to do vocal jams at shows.
• When you love them more than anything in the world, you can't get enough of them, even though you have been listening to them everyday for 10 years!

Submit: What do you think it means to be a phishhead?