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Mr.Scott:

• You make sure the cd that the person next to you is listening to is indeed phish.
   

Matty Hood:

• You dream about seeing Phish at least five times during the first weeks of February.
• You alternate watching the "Phish in Vegas" DVD and "Bittersweet Motel" every night in Jan. and Feb.
• You can't listen to Phish on NYE because it kills you to think what is happening at MSG RIGHT NOW!
• You go into the show exactly when the doors open just to make sure you are in for the opener.
• You listen to nothing but Phish from Feb.1-Mar. 1
• You do school projects based on Phish.
• You can't sit down before the show.
• You drive to your cousin's house an hour away to use his Optimum Online for Philly tix, then drive another hour to a ghetto music store for Nassau Tix.

TWIG:

• You spend more of your day designing cd-r covers for your latest shows than anything else.
• you watch The Weather Channel more often now because you heard Guyute and YEM a couple of times during your local forecast on the 8's.
• You covet the old tube of hemp lip balm (that is empty now) that you got at The Great Went.
• You can't wait to check the setlist from last night's show on phish.net when you get to work in the morning.

Ascending Forbin:

• You live in Chicago and borrow you parents' car to go to "Madison" for New Year's, knowing that if you had included the "Square Garden," you never could have gone.
• When someone is talking to you in English, you respond by singing the solo in Bathtub Gin.
• All those guys with beards and long hair that once looked like Jesus to you now look a whole lot more like Trey.
• You know more about how Phish met than how your parents did.
• When a non-phishhead asks you how the show was and you have to give up trying to tell them after 15 minutes.
• You think about getting a pet just to name it something phishy and give up since you can't decide on just one name.
• You walk away from someone who is in mid-sentence trying to describe their favorite Dave Matthews show.
• You already know what songs will be played at your wedding(s) and funeral.
• You ask a stranger who hates Phish to go to a show with you.
• You're lactose intolerant and not a huge fan of ice cream, but you buy Ben & Jerry's anyway.
• The tour starts, the world stops, you disappear.
• The worst show you've ever seen is still better than any other band you've happened to see.

Snippy:

• I awake every morning with sample in a jar ringing through my brain.

Rutherford the Brave:

• You break down and rejoice with tears upon hearing about the cease-hiatus, when you proceed to call all your phriends to share the euphoria.
• You hazily consider writing a treatise on the socio-political atmosphere of Gamehenge.
• You can happily kill hours and hours reading pholktales.
   

KrIckY:

• Your roommates come home and groan, "You are watching/listening to THEM AGAIN!"
• You actually enjoy the 5am train ride to work because you get through 1 disc of a show and finish the rest on the way home.
• You catch yourself gettin' down on a street corner in downtown San Francisco with your headphones so loud the dreddie boy next you mouths, Free, and you just smile.
• You rack up countless hours at work on phish sites.
• Every tape/disc makes you go WOW! these guys are unbelievable.
• You keep track of show dates and setlists of shows that you have no way of getting to ie east coast.
• When you still get chills listening to shows
• When the boys step out on stage in LA you have tears in your eyes because of the enormous smile that is plastered across your face and it stays there for the next week.
• You jam up the burner at work and have to explain why 3 of you had to have the Vegas show today.

April:

• You ask fishman to shake your hand and all he wants to do is sign your "pink thing" (it was the wristband)
• You come outta the show to find your car has been broken into, but when nothin seems missing you break out the coleman and cook up some grilled cheese(2/14)
• You accidentally learn from fishman that your lil girl shares the same name as page's lil girl when you buy an extra tic so u can miracle someone when you drive from maine to NC and all you get to see is Phish on their bus after the show when phish is an entire way of life.

Nicky:

• Your family asks you what your tour schedule is so they can plan weddings and other events.
• Your heart races every time you hear a live tune before a show.
• You spend all your phree time on websites that have to do with phish.
• You organize all your tickets chronologically.

Jake:

• You tell your friends the bad news that their cat was hit by a comet, and when they say they don't have a cat, you tell them that its because it got hit by a comet.

Sawyer:

• You wait and wait and wait, and finally you get to see Phish for the first time, and as they walk out onstage before you, there are uncontrollable tears pouring from your eyes, because they are truly the only musical act that captures your soul and makes you who you are.
• When you go to a show and you are hungry and searching for something, and as you walk out, you can actually say I'm fulfilled.
• You are the only person dancing at a party to phish and everyone else is like 'what the hell is that kind of dance?"
• You see phish walk out on stage and you can't stop the tears from phlowing
• You dance in the rain for 3 hrs in 30 degree weather
• You own more phish bootlegs than regular people own regular cd's
• Trey is a Jedi
• You would climb Mount Icculus and sell your soul to Wilson to have a ticket anywhere in the arena.

Ghostus Brown:

• You can only listen to Drowned from Darien 2000 in forty degree weather in your car while it's raining with the windows down. Any other time seems inappropriate.

Phriendofantelope:

• You absolutely will not go to bed until you see that show finished downloading and is YOURS!!
• You pay the person behind you toll b/c they have phishy stickers on their car
• You talk about set lists of shows that you haven't been to, to your friends like you were there for every second of it.

Dirty D:

• You've been around non-phishheads and attempted to do the YEM trampolines without a trampoline.

Reez:

• The only thing that you want to do before you die is enjoy a night with 4 guys that have become like your best phriends. thanks trey, page, mike, and fish. I guess there really is a heaven on this raisin called earth...

Brandon Shelby:

• You are walking through the streets of New York at three in the morning hoping that people don't think that your crazy.
• You go home telling all of your phriends that Tom Hanks sang the blatbumbudidybumbum part at the garden.

Roger:

• Every time you get a new tape of a show your jaw drops in awe and you can't help but say they're soooooo goooood!!! (the 2/14/03 show is epic so far)
• The tape player in your new car plays tapes a little slow so Trey's voice sounds like a monster, but you listen to your tapes anyways.
• You were on the phone for hours on Valentines day cause your friend called you and set his phone in his cup holder for you to here the show. (thanks dreddie)
• You can't help but chuckle when you see a word that has a ph in it even though it's supposed to be there.
• You're always tapping a beat 'cause you've always got a Phish song suck in your head.
• You are more than willing to drive a long long way to see the boys. IM me if your goin to NC or if you wanna chat about good music. PhriendlyPhace <---thats me

Mike:

• You can speak the phish language fluently.
• You eat cheesecake and meat sticks every new years.
• You make an independent music video for "Fee"

Morgan:

• Someone asks you how many brothers and sisters you have, and you reply with "Phar too many to count"....can't wait to see my PHAMILY again! CINCY!!!!

the driver:

• You've seen bitter sweet motel one million times and still can't get enough.
• You walk around spouting quotes from bitter sweet motel like, "What would you say is the biggest misconception about mike gordon?" or, "There are aspects of Boston that I Like!"
• You think that the oyster head album was good but had too much Les Claypool and not enough Trey.
• You have a Paul Languadoc sticker on your car.
• You find friendly notes on your car from other phishheads because they saw all the phish stickers on your car. -
• You phreaked out when mike joined trey for the encore at the tweeter center.
• You get frustrated because Trey is so much better than you at guitar.
• You think that the jam in the lizards on live phish 2 disc 1 sounds like the theme song at the end of Mario 2.
• Your band takes the stage to the song "That's the way I feel."

Dave Zany:

• Your a normal heterosexual male , yet you have a serious obsession with mike gordon.

Carl J:

• You send out an email officially announcing the end of your hiatus! see ya in LA-LV :)

Carini:

• You go insane listening to anything but Phish, and dread being in school, your longing for that wonderful sound.
• You cry tears of joy visiting this website, b/c it's not only your favorite but not only you love seeing how much other people appreciate phish as much as you do, their as thankful as you are.
• You tweak out every time someone doesn't hold a door open or go out of their way to do something nice for you. Then you immediately wonder 'if only you were a phish head'
• People will say things that are phish lyrics and you get that song stuck in your head for ex.. 'thats a waste of time' then you immediately hum for hours 'come waste your time with me'
• Every time you listen to phish you don't just listen, you feel them, and you can identify the difference, and there's NO feeling like it, you all know what i mean.
• You've marked your calendar with all of the boys tour dates, even if your not attending, unfortunately.
• People will tell you the Beatles are the all time best band, and when you hear this all you can do is look at them with a slight grin, wanting to laugh and laugh and fall apart!!! If they only knew!
• You have your own collection of phish screen names, and every time you get on them you can only imagine the looks of the peoples faces on the other side of the computer, i love it. sn - cwyourtwm, carini913

Prep School Hippie:

• A vacuum is no longer a household cleaning item, but a musical instrument.
• Lost your mind just a couple of times.
• When touring with Phish is not something to do one month, but a way of life

Amar:

• When you drive up to Hampton and you look at it like the 8th wonder of the world.
• when page smiled at you during your first show and it meant the world to you.
• when you buy a boomerang sampler b/c you know trey has one.
• when you saw vida blue @ roseland for NYE 2001 and the guy next to you gave you a hug when he saw gordo and trey walk out for the Encore.
• when you were a senior in high school and you drove to school every morning listening to a boot.
• when you got soooo happy when you met the dude who designed the 'antelope' symbol and you got even happier when he gave you an autographed sticker.
• when you should be studying for midterms, but you're writing this instead.

Jon Berry:

• When listening to Phish gives you massive goose bumps, and your smile cannot be contained!

Byrswa:

• You crash your entire schools server trying to get NYE tix in the library on every computer not in use.

Ziga:

• I AM A PHISHHEAD JUST BECAUSE I LOVE PHISH! <3ALWAYS

Carolow6:

• You care more about the phish stickers on a guys car...then the actual car itself (unlike most superficial girls) -tears came to your eyes when you heard the beautiful sound of Paige's voice sing Strange Design on New Year's for the first time live.

Twig:

• Every sentence you say has some quote or lyric from a phish tune.
• You wonder why so many bands stole "that song" from phish, then find out that phish was covering THEIR song.
• You collect every show you can even though you know it is likely you won't remember if you ever listened to all of them or not.

Ramona Warren:

• When your boss asks you to stop playing phish show tapes at work because they're "too funky" for him.

Mike Jolly Jones:

• You walk to Hampton with good friends, and getting a ride to the concert no
  charge.. on a greyhound bus...... Philly's only but a few days away..
  section 106, I'll see you all there.

Phil:

• Rent money gets spent on tour money.
• Your non phish friends hate you for sharin in the groove.
• Your non phish friends know phish songs and lyrics.

Ryan Miller:

• Every time someone mentions a cat dying, you reply with, " how 'bout a
  goldfish?"
• You force your unreceptive friends to listen to several YEM vocal jams
  and explain the pros and cons of each.
• When you meet someone who is obsessed with phish as you are, you hug
  them instinctually, knowing that so much is shared between the two of
  you. ( this just happened again last night!)
• When you steal Hood milk crates at every opportunity...just because you
  can't help yourself!

Alax521:

• You lay on your bed every night listening to phish staring at the posters on
  your wall and just space out until you fall asleep. Then you wake up and do
  the same thing for and hour before you get ready for school.
• you get a D on your biology exam instead of a C because you kept spelling
  fish with a ph.
• your in the Chesapeake Bay on your friends sail boat stranded at 9:30 at
  night because the motor wasn't working and you sing phish songs as loud as
  you can to pass the time away. You both wake up the next morning at his
  house and can barley talk because you have no voice left from last
  night (good times with my bud jimmy).
• you rename you dog floyd just for fun even though he doesn't answer you when
  you call him.
• you get your first pay check ever and blow the entire thing on phish cds,
  posters, and stickers just tell your parents that they just don't
  understand when they get mad at you for spending all your money.

Prep School Hippie:

• When you turn off the Radio when you hear "Heavy thinhgs" or "Bouncing
  Around the Room"
• Can't wait until your 21 to dip into your Trust Fund.
• When people ask what does your shirt mean and they don't understand.
• When you walk around Saying to yourself  "Run, Run, Run, Run, Run, Run"
• You only wear Birkenstocks.
• You know what Phish is saying in "Character Zero"

Mike:

• when non-phish friends ask how you can find so much in a song, like divided
  sky, w/ hardly any lyrics you just smile and don't even try to explain how
  you can feel the emotions through the music, and that's enough.
• you can't wait to hit the road this summer w/ the boys for your first tour.
• your so pissed you missed the nye show and the hampton run, but i'm still
  hoppin to find 2 philly tickets. (if you can help me out please drop me a
  line proudestmonkey_12@hotmail.com, you don't know the appreciation i'd
  have, and i'd repay anyway possible...this head needs to see his frist
  show!)
• page has inspired you to want to learn piano.

Mickeybulldog:

• your 15 and get kicked out of the house for jumping out a second story
  window @ 3 A.M. to drive 20 hrs (from philly to phlorida) to see phish
  for the mellenium

LFordham:

• You never forget a computer password, because they are all dvdsky
• your phish companion is nastier than the toilet it sits next to
• You stare at Ebay for a good while contemplating the 700$ floor seats to worcester... I mean, what good are all those savings bonds anyway?

William:

• you drive 9 hours to hampton with five friends and no one has a ticket to any of the three shows, however you and your five friends see a total of 18 sets and in all you didn't spend more than $150!! it was a blast boys... can't wait to get on the road again 2/25, 25, 26, 28. get ready!!!

dave k:

• you get have gotten into 2 car accidents because you were jamming so hard.

alan:

• you steal a live phish show from best buy because you need it so badly, but don't have enough money to pay for it.
• you miss a week of school to start walking from philadelphia to nyc to see phish on nye... luckily you were able to hitch a ride

dave:

• people on your dorm that don't even know what phish sounds like call you a phishhead
• your roommate says your obsessed
• your screenname is Phishhead27858--- i need someone to talk about phish with!
• on your way to the mountains you show your friends where greensboro coliseum is and make sure they know that's where the phish concert is goin to be

me.

• Playing Taboo with a bunch of friends, you and another head are on the same team.  The answer "dollop" comes up, and his clue is "the amount of mirk on the curb." I damn near pissed myself laughing. Of course nobody else saw the humor.

Zuk:

• You are going to jam with your phriend and you warn him of a hazard in the parking lot by saying, "Hey, It's Ice!"

Joe:

• You roll down the window in your car whenever you drive just to see iph anyone in the passing cars knows the sounds coming phrom yours... it rarely happens, but when it does, you both pheel it.

• It doesn't matter how late, or early you are phor something...you're sittin in that car till the song's over.

• Anytime you hear the boys you smile, you're not sure why, but you do. pheel phree to speak to me- Antelope1202

Chris Fauteux:

• people stop asking you what you're listening to and just start saying "oh, not again..."
• you're happy that "yes, again..." you are listening to phish
• you try to find pictures of the particular concert so you can use it as a cover for the copy of that show you just got in the mail (or, for your first show, most importantly)
• living in a swamp in florida for 5 days with no shower, and having been gone for a total of 8 days with no shower... isn't really all that bad... in fact, it was the best 8 consecutive days of your whole damn life...
• you had to sit on a bus for 34 hours each way during that 8 day no-shower period... and you still didn't care
• you didn't sleep the whole way down, because you were too excited to be there and didn't want to miss a moment of that pilgrimage... and you still didn't care!
• you consider your life in 3 distinct phases: pre-first-phish show, pre-Cypress NYE, and Post-hiatus
• 8.) phish was a stimulus in your interest in and appreciation of music, having grown and evolved into something that has a profound effect on your life and now that you can really HEAR music...you just can't, and refuse to live without it. I mean really HEAR it...to the point where you hear music in things that are not actually making music, your brain finds the pattern and you become cognizant of the fact that there is a rhythm and harmony in all things making sounds, and they have this extremely surreal synchronicity with other, completely unrelated events... like the door of a building closing, and at the same moment it closes, a car honks its horn, and your brain interprets that as the door just honked, phishy moment indeed!

Antelope:

• Your day starts off bad... and then you stop and think about phish, smile, and then it's all hood.
• You're seeing a show this tour, and it doesn't matter what happens until then, because you're seeing a show this tour.
• You tell your mom what songs they're playing during a concert, and even though she doesn't care, she knows the damn songs.

TheLoveofFee:

• Your mother named you Millie Grace after the fading beauty herself :)

Imaphishygirl:

• when someone tries to tell you that Phish is just a copy of grateful dead, you go so insane you can not speak. Two thoughts go through your head- Kill this character of zero, or do the phishy thing, and treat them to a show so they spend the rest of there life angry at themselves for saying that mad, unnecessary comment... IN HOPES, they become a new part of the pham. (happened the other day - totally blew away my mind... was stoned, too, to top it off with a feeling of insanity)

Alicia:

• when you start screaming out phish lyrics during the pep rallies in your high school, and all the cheerleaders want to melt you with their eyes, but you don't care cuz ur singing phish
• you make up your own language using phish lyrics and your friends ask you if phish is a country in Europe or something
• you drive to Vermont just to go past FARMHOUSES

Wilson:

• you are one of two people in your school who doesn't think phish sounds like elevator music.
• the first thing you do when you wake up is realize you're one day closer to feb 20th
• when you smoke with your non head phriends and you spend an hour trying to explain phish to them

gottajiboo:

• you listen to phish

the 1 and only suzy g:

• you still listen too the same tapes over and over for 9 years, and they keep getting better and better
• you like the boys so much you bring your family members too a show with U.
• you use a bathroom that 20,000 others did right before U, and you are still smiling when you get out...

Joe:

• The note your mom writes you so you can leave school early to go to a show says " Family Emergency"...and you know its not a lie.

Fluffhead420:

• You are the only phan at school, but it doesn't matter because it makes your passion that much more intense
• You are the residential phishhead/hippie in your neighborhood
• Anyone has ever used you as an example when giving one of those anti-drugs lectures :o)
• You're going to see phish thrice in Feb and March... anyone goin to the cincinatti or greensboro shows, talk to me...IM Jessicawva
• You just get it!

Ben Maloney:

• you skip a day of school to buy tickets to greensboro.
• you spend the money you saved for christmas presents on tickets
• you rent a hotel room 4 months in advance because you know heads are gonna do anything to find a place to crash after the show
• you spend three weeks tabbing out yem and then are too embarrassed to play it for anyone because it's not up to par with trey
• you get a ticket for stealing a deer crossing sign (painting antelope antlers on it, and then hanging it in your room)
• the guys in the guitar shop always try to sell me a new SG, but i tell them i'm saving my money for a guitar that is custom built by Paul Languedoc, and they say WHO?
• you've read books such as Go Phish and Run Like An Antelope: Life On The Road With Phish
• you almost cry when you first hear the chalkdust torture from 07.10.99 (Live Phish number 8)
• you have the complete saga of Gamehenge from 03.12.88 at Nectar's (the debut of Gamehenge for Trey's college project)
• you pay the money for the merchandise not because you think it's worth the money, but to support the band
• you plan to go to college in vermont and live there afterwards
• you bought the CD with phish and the Dude Of Life even though you can't stand the dude

Erin:

• you only listen to tapes cause studio music just isn't the same
• you can't remember not loving Phish

JMW:

• You check to see if this site updates as frequently as you would like it to, but it doesn't

Woods:

• You're the only kid in school who really worships phish
• Your friends make fun of you for wearing bootleg shirts and they say i should wear their crappy abercrombie shirts
• You put up your IM screename to meet other phish phriends "rastizion"
• You skip your family's cruise to bermuda to see the summer tour 03'
• Your real phriends join together when phish is on the road
• Your mom thinks you're wack for putting garlic on grilled cheese
• You've learned that Gamehenge is a state of mind....

phriendofantelope:

• you get made fun of when you present your porfolio to your AP art class cuz. they can tell most of the paintings have a phishy relation.
• you watch a movie (midnight express) with phriends and don't know the names of the characters, except for the guy that looks like an old Trey and is called "old trey".
• you call your backpack or whatever your ac/dc bag.
• you see a cop and shout "ahh! makisupa!"
• you and your phriend don't do anything in english besides come up with new drawings every day related to phish songs.
• you watched bittersweet, got high, then watched it again like it was a totally different movie.
• you can fall asleep to a show playing on your stereo when the volume is on 19.
• you have gotten kicked out of bio for telling the teacher to smell your mule.
• you think way too much about they boys.
• you hope that people going to the worcester show on 2/26 will IM you so you can both get even more stoked >> orange573.

Sunchild:

• you're going to celebrate your 1st wedding anniversary with your 1st wife at both of your's 1st show.

MindBender:

• you and your best phriend introduce each other as Vanessa and Reba
• you know what CWYTWM means.
• you get badgered by all your teachers phor constantly using ph instead of f.
• you not only phollow Phish, but you make sure to catch all the Phix shows too.
• you've lost phriends because they say you spend more time with Phish than you do with them.
• just by looking at someone you can see if they're a phishead or not.... screename- mindBender0o :)

Dave:

• you know that the gourds cover gin and juice, not phish.
• you sneak into the fortress that is MSG.
• you know who chris kuroda is.
• you saw TAB, vida, Mike and leo, pork tornado and jmp just hoping that there would be a guest appearance.

Nikki:

• your first show is at msg on nye, and you nearly crap your pants and hyperventilate. oh man, the greatest thing i have yet to endure.
• you're ok with only having one friend that actually wants to chill with you, because the rest call you a stupid phishhead hippie... and you are so proud.

Imaphishygirl:

• you know what YEM and TMWSIY means.
• tears phlowed out of your eyes when the clock hit 12 on 1/1/03 because you couldn't be at the show.
• you argue with your teacher that golgi is pronounced golGi not golgee until class is over, everyday.
• you can listen to the music and you don't need lyrics to understand what Phish was pheeling when they wrote it.
• you constantly get tickets going through red lights because you refuse to be a slave.
• you feel honored to phill in some things on being a true phishyphan.
• you have a different Phish shirt for every day of the week.
• you name your cat Harpua, and your dog Posterus Nutbagus.
• your tapes don't phit under your bed anymore.
• whenever you're leaving somewhere you leave with, "This has all been wonderful but now I'm on my way" .
• you start to pheel sad knowing you're the only phishyphan in your school... please swim with me -screenname- Imaphishygirl

Adam:

• You are in your car listening to a raging "Help on the Way/Slipknot/Franklin's Tower" GD medley, and you say to yourself, "Man, they sound just like Phish."
• You are so excited about the NC show in March that you warm up by seeing Galactic, moe., hookah, and DTB all within three weeks before the show.
• Your favorite song to listen to is Bomb Factory Tweezer full.

cinspeak:

• You stick your only copy of RoundRoom on the windshield of a car loaded with Phish stickers.

mamastrecky:

• When the last notes are played on 1/3/03 in Hampton and the lights come on, tears are streaming down your face from the extreme energy that just phlowed thru the entire show. Emotional overload. SICK show and I WAS THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

monicka:

• you passed up $2,000 to see your first phish show at MSG on new year's.
• you were in denial when phish dibanned.
• you try to forget about "the hard times" when phish wasn't around for those 2 grueling years.

derek:

• u spend 200 bucks on tickets to the upcoming show in north carolina, and you are so happy that u forget about the money, grab your self a drink, crank up the tunes, and dance your ass off.

phisherman370:

• you have been a phan for about a year and are the only head in your school (IM me harryhood728 at phisherman370 and any other people that feel the same way)

phour twenty:

• you can drive around by yourself, listen to a phish song, and need to pull over because you are jamming too hard to be safe on the roads.
• waste from 8-9-98 comes on, and you start crying for no reason other than pure beauty, and happiness.
• you get so pumped to check the setlists of shows as they happen, because it's fun to kick yourself in the balls for not being there.

harryhood728:

• you have been a phan for about a year and notice that you are becoming more and more depressed by the fact that you are the only phishhead in your school

Leah:

• After spending the last 4 New Year's Eves with Phish, during the hiatus your son is born on NYE 2000 and is named Wilson.
• When you can't make it to the NYE 2002 show because it is his 2nd birthday, your best friend who is there calls you when they play Wilson and holds the phone up so you can hear everyone screaming his name!

Nemo:

• everything has a lengthy explanation at arms length, yet stays so far in space for so long as you tumble and warble the hours of sitting; the "nothing but another show" attitude... what really matters anyway, that we remain traffic light slaves in a mockery of hippie values and left wing rhetoric.

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